I had the pleasure yesterday of telling my ex-wife about Conny. Since Conny is coming on the 26th, and leaving the 3rd, it means I won't see my ex until after that. For such a large chunk of time, and seeing how things are going with Conny, I felt she should know. She took it in her usual way, pragmatically, supportively, sarcastically, and I could see it upset her. There's no way around it though. I thought we'd be having this type of conversation much later, since I really have not been looking for a relationship with anyone.

And, then later that day, she got a call from the guy she's been seeing for a few weeks now, and he wants to "just be friends." Talk about a double slam in one day. Of course, it just brought her back to all the things I said to her when we seperated, and it was a difficult blow. She called me up that night, and was feeling pretty low. I wish she'd get a break. I really want her to be happy. We talked for awhile, and I tried to help her keep some perspective on it, but I can't blame her for being miserable. This time for her is the shits, and I feel pretty hideous for my contribution to that. It's hard, because I want to try to fix things for her as much as possible, but I have to hold myself back a lot. There are some things that fixing in the short term will do more harm then good. She understands this, but it kills both of us sometimes.

Still, there is no doubt that I did the right thing. Just that sometimes doing the right thing has a high price. I just wish she didn't have to pay as well.
posted 2:44 PM | link |