Nightmare on Elmhurst
The man with the real dish about the Chicago ho-down is Weezoh. He's got video of the debauchery, and I hear for a small price you can either get a copy, or, if you are in it, have yourself editted out. There' s a live concert performance of the Red Quill theme song
"Stand By Your Clan" on that tape which should keep a lot of people out of any public office for a long time to come. Wisely, I hid in the bathroom during that event.
Since the Chicago Red Quill DVD probably won't be on Amazon for another few days while Weez works some iMovie magic on it, I suppose I'm not off the hook for writing about all the things that transpired in the four days Conny and I were there. No one really cares about the fiasco of our journey to the actual gathering, you all just want vicious dish on the other attendees.
Everyone who attended was absolutely lovely and charming. And my saying this has nothing to do with several embarassing photos that were taken of me while I was passed out in a drunken stupor and posed into doing things even
I'm uncomfortable with. I suppose those pictures are going to come out eventually, so I might as well be honest about what happened.
Some highlights:
- There are several airports in Chicago, so a wise traveller will be sure to check which one he or she is flying into.
- There are several Amerisuites in Chicago, so a wise traveller will be sure to be certain which one he or she is staying at.
- It costs $30 for a taxi between the O'Hare Amerisuites and the Elmhurst Amerisuites.
- Amerisuites do not have restaurants or bars, so bring your own supplies.
- Chicago in June is cold.
- I know about 24 people who would benefit from a bit more exposure to sunlight. Kodo is exempt from that. I, however, am included in that.
- It is against Amerisuites policy to allow 20 people in one room.
- There aren't many other places for 20 or so people to go in an Amersuites, so, it's "don't ask, don't tell."
- Michael Aridfox, Xantcha and J'Kar take loooooong smoke breaks.
- Two band geeks in one gathering is challenging stuff.
- Futher to the previous comment, a pennywhistle apparently often lists for a lot more than penny.
- Shepherd seems to have a problem with local law enforcement, and they made it clear his kind is not welcome at the Navy Pier. That included all the people in his car as well.
- There is evidence, but it's not conclusive, that Healery and Tayra are either part of a single mind, or are adept at telepathy.
- Shatuga the recently ex-teacher wasn't nearly as curly as Shatuga the entrepreneur. He also works a lot more.
- Drenn is the real-world opposite of a pathfinder. More like a pathloser. Do not follow him anywhere.
- Shepherd summed up Slyph to the letter. Just the wrong letter.
- It's not correct to pronounce "Txara Serene" as "Texas Ranger." It also leads to getting a black eye. Man, for a sweet looking woman, she's got a mean left-hook.
- Hands down, Newton wins the longest beard contest. It compliments a plaid shirt well, too, as he demonstrated.
- As Nuvali found out, it's not a good idea to bring a non-clanning spouse to one of these things. As soon as they could sneak out of dinner, she pulled a concealed weapon on the guy, and made him drive away from us freaks at top speed.
- Lanna is truly, truly, truly addicted to Clan Lord. When the hotel Internet connection was down for so long, I saw her hands shaking. I think she was air-typing "/pray please bring the connection back."
- Though she doesn't clan much, Missi plays one mean game of Spaceward Ho. Ouch.
- Demonstrating good sense for her age, Kira managed to secure accomodations a good safe distance away from the rest of us. She also managed to stay close to a working Internet connection. I sense bright things in her future.
I know everyone is jonesing for juicy details, but between all the glue we were sniffing, and the shots of Nyquill, it's a bit of a blur. In a nutshell:
- Planning for meals
- Dealing with the logistics of getting to meals, which is tricky with 20 plus people
- Actually eating the meals
- Finding booze
- Buying booze
- Drinking booze
- Talking about Clan Lord, including endless Clan Lord related jokes, most of which were good for eliciting groans.
- Making an effort to actually get into the city of Chicago from the suburb of Elmhurst.
- Sitting in the sun, talking about Clan Lord
- Giving out official Nox Sorora t-shirts to the faithful, and friends of the faithful, with love from Nori.
- Some swimming in the hotel pool which meant seeing a lot of very, very, very white flesh.
- Having our party crashed by someone with a serious substance problem, and very large testicles to boot.
So, you didn't really miss much.
posted 10:15 PM | link |